Dear Diary
by 2001SilverRose
Summary: A diary that was found after Kagome committed suicide
1. Lonely

**I DO NOT own Inuyasha the honors go to Rumiko Takahashi**

_Summary: A diary that was found after Kagome committed suicide_

**Dear Diary **

**Chapter 1- Lonely**

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_**Date: 9-9-01**_

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_Dear Diary,_

_A long as I can remember, I have always been lonely. Nobody really seemed to care about me. Sure people let me hang out with them in the past but they always ignored me; never paid me any attention. My mom is a drunken whore and my dad died before I was even born along with my grandparents. My brother is so embarrassed to have me as his sister that he tells his friends that I am his cousin. That his real sister was a stillborn. The first few times I tried to correct him, it ended up him beating me up so I just gave up. Eventhough my brother is one of the populars; I'm one of the losers. I never get noticed. I am always ignored. Nobody acknowledges me, not even the teachers. The only time I am noticed is when I do something to embarrass myself. I've always been lonely, stuck in my own fantasies. Sometimes I try to act them out, but it only ends up causing me more loneliness. People ignore me more and more. They never look at me or let me hang out with them. The teachers don't even call out my name or grade my homework and my report card. It's like I'm a ghost. Like I never existed and my mom was never pregnant with me and my big brother is the only child. I know that my mom and brother try to think that way but they know it's not true since we live in the same shrine. I would've said house but last month my mom moved all of my stuff to the scary, dark well house that is behind the house. This only added more to my loneliness. This caused me to be more invisible and I'm afraid that one day not only am I going to be invisible at school and at home but everywhere. No matter where I go I'm afraid that the people that see me will only see an empty space. They will slowly forget about me and never say hi or do anything to remind me that I'm still here. Unfortunately, that's coming true. Unless I bump into someone, I am not noticed. I'm starting to believe that I will never be. I'm also starting to believe that I don't exist. That I'm just a wandering spirit that was killed or committed suicide and is trying to fit in again. Only to be disappointed because the person I chose would also suffer the same fate. Oh crap! I hear my mom. Well that's enough writing about my problems._

_Sincerely,_

_Kagome Higurashi_


	2. Beatings

**I DO NOT own Inuyasha the honors go to Rumiko Takahashi**

_Summary: A diary that was found after Kagome committed suicide_

**Dear Diary**

**Chapter 2- Beatings**

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_**Date: 9-10-01**_

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_Dear Diary,_

_You know how I stopped writing because my mom came home. Well she was drunk and whenever she's drunk she beats me up. It all started on my 4th birthday. I started going to school and I made her look bad in front of my kindergarten teacher. My teacher was a he and my mom thought that he was cute and she always reminds me that I ruined her second chance of happiness. That's around the time she also started drinking. She beat me up day and night and my brother watched. I called him for help but he never helped me. One night I asked him why he never stops mom from beating me up. Wanna know what his answer was? He answered by saying, " You deserve this pain Ka-go-me. It's your damn fault that dad, grandpa, and grandma are dead! You should have never been born!" Then he started beating me up. When my mom saw him beating me up, she cheered him on. It was a monthly thing, then a weekly thing, and now its a daily thing. I always have to cover my bruises with make-up or wear pants and long sleeve turtle necks when I run out of make-up. My mom gave me a huge bruise on my stomach and almost broke my spine. Unfortunately, my brother also decided to join in on the 'fun.' The injuries he gave me were worse than mom's. He hit my head with 3 beer bottles and gave me 7 bruises and even cut me. Many would have yelled for help but I don't anymore. Wanna know why? Because they will beat me up worse than before. Plus, I'm so used to the pain that I feel nothing. Nothing at all. My body just goes numb after the first hit. My brain shuts down and I feel like a lifeless doll. But tomorrow is going to be worse. Tomorrow is my birthday and the 16th anniversary of my dad's and grandparents' death. On this day, I get beat up to the point to were I almost die. My mom and brother burn me and whip me. Heck, I think I saw acid somewhere in the kitchen. I just hope that my shitty life just ends tomorrow because if it doesn't, I don't know how much longer I can live for.  
_

_Sincerely,_

_Kagome Higurashi_

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**A/N:**

**Hay guys and yes this is another sad depressing story. ****This story is going to have about 7 chapters and maybe a one-shot sequel. I'm not sure yet but I'll let you guys now. Hope you guys had a great day and please review if you can. Californiaroseluv out!**

**P.S**

**heather . murray . 9237**** I am going to talk about the inu gang just be patient with me ok**


	3. Death

**I DO NOT own Inuyasha the honors go to Rumiko Takahashi**

_Summary: A diary that was found after Kagome committed suicide_

**Dear Diary **

**Chapter 3- Death**

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_**Date: 9-11-01**_

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_Dear Diary,_

_Wanna know what happened today? Today some airplanes crashed into the Twin Towers and to tell you the truth I 'm not really shocked. I mean someone always dies on my birthday. For example, my father, grandparents, and my two best friends. Yes I used to have best friends. It all started around middle school. People used to make fun of me and beat me up. It kept going until a group of people befriended me. Their names were Inuyasha, Sango, Miroku, Shippo, and Kilala. They were well-known for saving people from bullies. Shippo and Miroku were the ones who noticed me first then they told Inuyasha, Sango and Kilala. It was a really weird experience for me. Nobody except for them wanted to help me. Especially, Shippo and Miroku. They were always right next to me. They even didn't want to leave me alone to go to the restroom! After a month or so, I started warming up to them. I told them about my problems at home and my were also really protective over me. They didnt even let Inuyasha touch me without threatening him and didn't want me to hang out with Sango and Kilala with other girls because they were afraid that the other girls might find ways to break me. It was annoying at times but I was really happy. Before them, no boy wanted to go near me without wanting to beat me up. I was really glad to have them as my best guy friends. I thought that this was finally it. That I finally found the happiness I would forever have. But I was so young and foolish in those days. Being the stupid girl I was, I told my mom about them. She found out were they lived and everything. She also came up with an amazing plan to make my life a living hell again. When she was in high school she took acting classes and she thought that she could use that to her advantage. My birthday was coming up in three days. She invited the gang to go to my house and celebrate my birthday. They all agreed and kept this a secret since they were doing a surprise party for me. On my birthday, well let's just say that being the cruel bitch my mom is she killed Shippo and Miroku and blamed it all on me. Inuyasha, Sango, and Kilala didn't believe her at first until she showed them a video of "me" running over them. Then, they believed her and told/texted everyone at school that I killed Shippo and Miroku. I tried to convince them that it wasn't me. I told them that I walked to the ramen shop on the corner to get my paycheck from my boss. Unfortunately, they let their anger and grief to get the best of them and beat me up. They banged my head into the wall and rolled me down the stairs. At that night, I cried because not only were the two people that ever cared about me dead but my mom once again found a way to destroy me. The next day, the police came and arrested me. I went to court and told the judge the whole truth. My boss was even nice enought to bring in the video that was taken of me getting my paycheck at the same time Miroku and Shippo were killed. I was found innocent but the school didn't want to believe that so they continued to treat me like trash. Also, that was around the same time that the teachers stopped grading my test and homework. Oh no! My mom is calling me with her motherly voice. I guess my brother and her just want to see me in pain. Oh well, what can I do? I have the shities life and I have no control of if. I hope my birthday wish can come true and I can die today.  
_

_Sincerely,_

_Kagome Higurashi_

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**A/N:**

**Hay readers! Hope you liked chapter 3 of _Dear Diary_. Please review and follow if you can and see you next time! 2001SilverRose out!**


	4. The Bully

**I DO NOT own Inuyasha the honors go to Rumiko Takahashi**

_Summary: A diary that was found after Kagome committed suicide_

**Dear Diary **

**Chapter 4- The Bully**

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_**Date: 9-12-01**_

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_Dear Diary,_

_Unfortunately, I'm still living. When I found out that I will still continue living I cried myself to sleep. Like every birthday, I dreamt about all of the times I was bullied. Which is pretty much my whole damn life. It started with my mom and brother beating me up and then 2nd grade came and a transfer student, who was a bully, decided to bully me. It didn't hurt at first since my favorite teacher of all time, Mrs. Kaede, always made me feel better and got the bully in trouble. But then she died when I was in fourth grade. They say that she had a heart attack but I knew better. My bully gave me hints that he killed her. He sent me pictures of her lifeless body surrounded by her blood and even sent me a video of him killing her with a butcher knife. Since the day of her death, whenever by bully bullied me it hurt. It hurt so much that I can't describe how much it hurt. Trust me when you get bullied and you are still depressed about a loved one's death, its hurts like fucking hell. I cried whenever he mentioned Kaede's name and always blamed that her death was my fault. And I slowly started to believe him. I mean, if only I didn't tell Mrs. Kaede that he was bullying me, which led him to her suspended and grounded, then she would still be alive. I still believe that her death was my fault. You might be thinking that I should stop believing that I was the cause of her death, but I can't! Shippo and Miroku tried to do that but I still felt guilty and then they had to die which added more to my guilt! My bully still goes to my school and reminds me of it every damn fucking DAY! HE JUST WON'T STOP! I HOPE HE DIES AND GOES TO HELL OR SUFFER LIKE I AM! IF YOU ARE READING THIS JINENJI I HATE YOU! JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE SO FUCKING BIG DOESN'T MEAN YOU HAVE TO RUIN MY FUCKING LIFE!_

_Well I'm done with this entry, I have to go and take out my anger on something or someone_

_Sincerely,_

_Kagome Higurashi_

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**A/N:**

**I know it's pretty short but don't worry, I'm gong to update another chapter in like about 10 mins or so. I also know that you guys might be upset that I made sweet Jinenji the mean guy but I thought that making Naraku the mean guy would be boring. I mean, every fanfiction that I've read Naraku is the mean guy so I thought why not make a nice guy the mean one and Jinenji popped into my mind. Imma try to make the next chapter longer ok. Please review, follow, and favorite if you can. 2001SilverRose out!**


	5. Cutting

**I DO NOT own Inuyasha the honors go to Rumiko Takahashi**

_Summary: A diary that was found after Kagome committed suicide_

**Dear Diary **

**Chapter 5- Cutting**

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_**Date: 9-13-01**_

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_Dear Diary,_

_My damn wrist hurt. If you were thinking that I sprained it then you are 100% wrong. Do you remember that I said that I was going to take out my anger on something or _someone_? Well by someone I meant me. I saw a pair of scissors on my bed so I thought, why no try causing myself physical pain so that I can't feel my emotional pain? And it worked. Yea it will leave a scar but if you ask me, it's all worth it. I rather have scars than feel emotional pain. I already have scars on my heart so why not show the rest of the world how scared my heart is. I started cutting myself right after Shippo's and Miroku's death. I was desperate to get rid of the pain and the pills didn't work so I used scissors to get rid of the pain I felt. Sure it added to the pain at first but then it lessened. Like one pain was gone and I only had the better pain left. So I started dong this every night. I hid the scissors in my drawer and my scars with make up or clothes. I had to make sure that my mom and brother thought that they created the scars and not me. My plan seems to be working. As long as, they think that then the less pain I'll have to go through. I don't really like cutting but it's the only thing I know that will take away my pain. Well and you diary but there's so much I can write and sometimes writing isn't enough. Shit! One of my cutting wounds reopened, now I have to change the bandage. It hurts but not that much. I hope my mom and brother aren't home or fucking someone and won't be stopping until I finish grabbing the bandages. Oh I think I heard my mom and my brother giggle and...kissing. Well my life can't get any stranger than this. But on the bright side, they are barely starting which means more time for bandage stealing._

_Sincerely,_

_Kagome Higurashi_

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**A/N:**

**Yes there's a bit of incest in the end. Don't complain if you don't like it, I don't like incest too but I put it in my writing. Hope you liked this chapter and 2 more till I finish this story. Oh yea, I am also doing a one-shot sequel for this story ok. Please follow, review and favorite if you can. 2001SilverRose out!**


	6. Rape

**I DO NOT own Inuyasha the honors go to Rumiko Takahashi**

_Summary: A diary that was found after Kagome committed suicide_

**Dear Diary **

**Chapter 6- Rape**

**WARNING: DESCRIPTION OF INCEST****/RAPE. **

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_**Date: 9-14-01**_

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_Dear Diary,_

_Going to the house and getting the bandages was a HUGE mistake. My brother came into the bathroom to go get a condom for him and mom but he caught me. He gave me an evil grin and I started running. Let me tell you it was a big mistake. He caught up with me and grabbed my ankles and pulled me upstairs into the room he was going to fuck mom. He pressed some of my pressure points so I could stop kicking and put a gag in my mouth. My mom had that evil gleam and smile and grabbed a blindfold and blindfolded me. Then my brother carried me and I could feel him tying me to the bed. I heard the door close and my mom whisper in my ear, "Dear the other times we hurt you is going to feel like a walk in the park when we're done with you." After she said that, I was scared. I was so scared that I was shaking even though the pressure points were still in effect. I tried to move any part of my body but then my brother came back from getting whatever he was getting. I hear a box drop and I knew it was the box of sex toys my mom always keeps in the attic. Before I knew it, my clothes were ripped from my body. Hands were toughing my body. I felt them on my stomach breast, nipples, thighs, and my privates. Two hands left my body and it seemed that they were getting something from the box. Then three fingers entered my vagina. My cries were muffled by the gag in my mouth. It hurt so much. I tried to move but I still couldn't. The fingers left my vagina only to feel something cold and wet on my clit and someone spreading it. After that person was done, something entered my vagina and deflowered me. I felt tears start falling down from my face. My mom was right; this hurts way more from the other times they hurt me. Not only did I feel physical pain but emotional pain also. I felt so dirty. No matter how much I cried or yelled, I knew that nobody could hear me except for my tormentors. After 4 hours of being whipped, cut, burned, and fucked, they stopped and left me alone. Unfortunately, that wasn't the end of it. I heard pictures being taken. At that moment I knew the real reason why they did this to me. They were going to put it all over school. They knew that the whole school is going to think that I wasn't raped but that I did this willingly. While they were taking pictures I was thinking: This is the end for me. I can feel it closer. And I really do feel my end coming closer. I just hope that it comes sooner than later. _

_Sincerely,_

_Kagome Higurashi_

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**A/N:**

**The next chapter is the final one then I am making one-shot sequel for this story ok. Please follow, review and favorite if you can. 2001SilverRose out!**


	7. Note

**I DO NOT own Inuyasha the honors go to Rumiko Takahashi**

_Summary: A diary that was found after Kagome committed suicide_

**Dear Diary **

**Chapter 7- Note**

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_**Date: 9-15-01**_

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_Dear Diary,_

_So today everyone made looked at me in disgust because of the photos all over the school. I was right. The bitch, that is my mother, and the douchebag, that is my brother, taped the pictures they took after they raped me. And today is the last day I am going to write in you. Wanna know why? Well because I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE! I AM DONE WITH THIS FUCKING WORLD! FUCK ALL OF THOSE PEOPLE THAT MADE ME FEEL USELESS, WORTHLESS, ANNOYING, UNIMPORTANT, UGLY, FAT, LONELY AND DEPRESSED! ALSO IF YOU GUYS ARE READING THIS, THANK YOU FOR MAKING ME CUT, FOR RAPING, BULLYING, BEATING ME UP AND MAKING ME FEEL GUILTY FOR KAEDE'S , SHIPPO'S AND MIROKU'S DEATHS! I HOPE YOU ALL END UP IN HELL AND I HOPE ALL OF YOU FEEL HAPPY! YOU GOT YOUR WISHES! I AM FINALLY FUCKING DEAD AND OUT OF YOUR LIVES! _

_I don't give a shit if you don't care about what I am going to say but anyways imma tell you._ **_I_**_**did NOT **__**kill myself, you killed me**_

_Sincerely, from the most hated girl of the whole galaxy,_

_Kagome Higurashi_

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**A/N:**

**I know this is a short chapter but all of my chapters were short anyways so who cares right. Also, I would like it if you showed you friends this story. There was actually two reasons why I wrote this story. Reason 1: I was sad and Reason 2: People out there are suffering like this and I wanted to show you guys how they feel. Hope you liked _Dear Diary _and please follow, review and favorite if you can. The sequel is coming up tomorrow or in a few hours. 2001SilverRose out!**


	8. ITS FINALLY OUT

**THE SEQUEL FOR _DEAR DIARY_ IS NOW OUT.**

**HERE'S THE LINK**

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** w w w . fan fiction / s / 9951038 / 1 / The - Girl - Who - Affecte d - Those - Around - Her**

**(take away the spaces)**


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